3 Proven Methods For Promoting Emotional Detachment

It can be extremely overwhelming when you are in a relationship with someone who is emotionally damaging. You might have asked yourself:

‘How do I stop the emotional pain?’

‘How do I get over the relationship ending?’

Why can't I just forget about this?

Does this sound like you? If so, I want to reassure you that it is very common to experience such thoughts and feelings. While there is no quick or easy way to get over a relationship ending, the good news is that you can learn how to emotionally detach from someone you are connected to in this way. It's safe to say that the majority of us have experienced a bad relationship phase; you’re not alone!

As you process the ending of your relationship, feel free to be sad, grieve, and/or shed some tears. In the midst of your heartache, it is also the time to be selfish and reward yourself. Spend your time getting back to who you were before and also focus on future goals for where you would like to be. Yes, this is absolutely the time when you will tell others, "I'm just working on myself"...then, actually do it! You are your best asset so make sure that you're the main focus! Detaching yourself from someone doesn’t have to end on a bad note. It's all about perspective. Choose to look at it as the closing of one chapter and the opening of another in the book of life. It is indeed a new beginning and a transformation phase. You are evolving and should trust the process. Also, enjoy while you're at it!

At what point should you emotionally detach?

You realize that you are stuck in a toxic relationship that is emotionally damaging. When you weigh the pros and cons, your cons list is a mile long but you're struggling to find the pros. Maybe your partner or spouse was unfaithful or abusive. Maybe this cycle has repeated many times over the past several years. Maybe you find yourself crying and thinking of an escape from the relationship. Maybe you're even questioning your sanity or what you did wrong. All of the above reasons and several unnamed others would be indicators that it's time to move on from the relationship and emotionally detach.

Ask yourself: Are you sad, depressed, crying out of the blue, or emotionally drained? If so...it's time to seriously think about things and put them into perspective.

Follow these steps to assist you in learning how to detach from someone emotionally and move on with your life:

1. Emotionally detach by being preoccupied (getting busy)

Sometimes in relationships you get too attached to your partner and detaching yourself from them becomes difficult. However, you can fill that time where you're thinking of them and feeling sad by getting busy. Put your preoccupied mind and energy into important thoughts and set goals for yourself. Now is the time to invest in you! After all, this is the gift that keeps on giving. Is there something you've always wanted to do? Unfulfilled career goals? Home remodeling? A fitness goal? Now is the time for you to execute. Brainstorm an effective strategy to achieve whatever goals you've set for yourself.

2. Practice self-care...often

If you're recovering from an emotional attachment to someone who was toxic, you are probably very drained and preoccupied with thoughts of things they did or said to you. It's time to reverse that and put the focus on you. Get preoccupied with self and begin investing your time in self-care activities.

Examples of self-care activities include:

Going to the spa, participating in a hobby, taking a trip, taking a bubble bath with aromatherapy and soft music, meditating, or watching your favorite sport on TV. Of course there are many other activities that promote emotional wellbeing and self-care. Basically anything you find enjoyable will work. Just do it! You deserve it!

3. Reconnect with estranged family members and/or old friends

Some relationships turn out to be toxic and all consuming. When this happens one tends to lose connections to friends and family members. Reconnecting may seem like a daunting task because you haven't connected with anyone in so long. However, you can fix this by just reaching out.

Try not to worry about being judged for being absent. Your real friends and loved ones will be glad to have you back. They will welcome and accept you with open arms.